"These things I have spoken to you, so that in Me you may have peace. In the world you have tribulation, but take courage; I have overcome the world." - John 16:33

Wednesday, February 16, 2011

Best laid plans...

The alarm went off at 6am as it does every morning in our house.  I hear my husband sleepily get out of bed and stumble into the shower and I lay there listening.  I'm listening for the sound of awake children in the baby monitors by my head.  I hear Peanut make a noise and I know he's awake.  I feel a tight nervousness in the pit of my stomach.  Today’s the day.  I've been weary of heavy metal testing, mostly because I'm afraid of the treatment.  Our Naturopath had called me last Friday and assured me that the chelating dosage was triple checked and we were "good to go".  I had picked up the dosage of DMSA on Monday.  I had a handful of urine bags (because Peanut is not potty trained) and was ready...but nervous.  It's rare for us to have a day at home so it's a treat for us to be in the house all day so I had planned all kinds of activities for the day.  I was looking forward to the time with my children.  I got Peanut up, I changed his diaper and carefully applied the urine bag and gave him his dose of his chelating medication. I gave him his juice and cookie (GFCFSF of course, a bribe to get him to take the DMSA) and was ready for the day. 

An hour later I checked Peanuts diaper and realized it had leaked.  I found the leak, reapplied another bag and sat the kids at the table for some breakfast.  After I got them down from their chairs I checked peanuts diaper and the bag had leaked again.  I was beginning to get discouraged.  I asked everyone and anyone I could to find out how to fix this problem.  A friend called and suggested cutting a hole in the diaper to let the bag hang straight down.  I tried it and it helped!  I got my first little bit of urine and began to feel a little better.  I decided I should try putting cotton balls in his diaper as well and off we went to the drugstore.  While we were out, the urine bag leaked.  I got home, changed the urine bag again and gave the kids lunch.  So far no activities were done and I spent the time chasing Peanut around checking the urine bag for leaks.  

By mid afternoon Peanuts skin was red and raw and the bag had leaked again.  As I was trying to carefully remove the bag he began to cry. "No mamma, stop, it hurts mamma! Owww!!"  It took everything inside of me to stop the tears from pouring down my cheeks.  "I'm so sorry angel, I'm so sorry."  I kept saying.  "That’s it, I give up!  No more bags!"  Peanuts eyes lit up like I had just offered him a lolly pop. "No more bags?" He said.  "No more bags honey." I replied.  He smiled.  We finished removing the bag, I shoved a handful of cotton balls into the front of his diaper and let him run off and play. I was relieved to not have to worry about another leaky bag but began to stress and worry that we wouldn't get enough urine for the test.  I don't want the results inaccurate.  The time period when I got the most samples was when the metals would be at it's highest (due to when the dose of DMSA was given) so I was afraid the result could show high level of something when it really wasn't that high.  So here I was taking wet cotton balls out of his diapers on an hourly basis and squeezing as much urine out of them as I could.  I decided to try to find something to take my mind off the urine test.

I read some more about the latest insurance reform and got even more frustrated.  We recently found out that no matter what happened with the insurance reform mandate our insurance was not bound by state law and they were going to call me back to let me know what they "decide" to give us for Autism coverage.  Hmmmm... pay for services or don't pay for services, what were they going to chose?  It makes me sick to know how many children out there go without therapy for one reason or another.  I checked our bank account and paid some bills.  That was another thing to add to my mounting stress to say the least.  Sassy awoke from her nap and was in a grumpy mood.  She whined and cried throughout the rest of the afternoon.  I knew she was hungry but wouldn't eat anything until supper. 

I made Salmon, brain food, and Sassy's favorite.  She couldn't resist and she ate an entire plate full.  I gave the kids a tub and I calmed a bit more.  They splashed around and we sang songs.  I called my mom after the bath was done and I vented and I cried.  A good cry and talk with my mommy always helps.  She gave me a little pep talk and I felt better.  As I hung up I realized it was an hour past Peanuts usual bedtime.  I took his hand and led him to bed.  We said our prayers and I put him to bed.  I took a deep breath and said goodnight with a bit of exasperation.  I was happy to be one step closer to bed.  As I walked out of Peanuts room and began to close the door, I heard a little voice from the crib say, "I love you."  and suddenly all my stress melted away and my exasperation was well worth it. 

"Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up." Galatians 6:9

Mommy Provost


  1. I love that verse!
    Following you from Hopeful Parents.


  2. Hi Marcia! Thanks for following. :-)